Whether through my own experiences or simply being close to those who were experiencing it, pain was always within reach when I was growing up. I can’t recall a night I didn’t fall asleep feeling sad, scared, or confused as a kid. That’s not to say that there weren’t joyful experiences or that joy wasn’t a part of my childhood – I mean, how could it not be? I was well-taken care of, I enjoyed eating and wearing the best (at least by my standards) and I had a family who loved me fiercely.
But I still wasn’t able to articulate and wrap my mind around what happened at four – being touched by another little girl and being exposed to sexual sin very early on – nor was I able to wrap my mind around many of the other pain points that left me feeling rejected and frustrated.
Why was my dad gone? Why did loneliness grip my heart regularly, though I had many childhood friends to play with? Why did I have to sleep with my mother throughout my years in college because mental illness came to hunt me down in my late teens and early twenties? Why did death seem to surround me – from childhood friends to family to the innocent lives of people who were close to my age?
One thing I’ve come to realize is that all of the pain I experienced could be used for two things. I could either continue to put my pain in the hands of the enemy and allow him to use it to cause me to partner with anger, fear, and sin; or I could put it in the hands of God and trust Him to turn it into something purposeful for His glory.
Allowing pain to produce promise doesn’t come naturally to any of us. It’s not something we can do in our strength and it’s not something we often ask for. We just want the pain to go away. However, as cliché as it sounds, there is purpose in the pain. God may not have caused it, but He can certainly use it.
Here are three ways you can look at the pain in your life and partner with the Holy Spirit to help you partner with God for the greater purpose behind it:
1) Apply pressure to life. Don’t let life pressure you. Easier said than done, right? I know. But this goes back to developing a relationship with the Holy Spirit. Most of the time, after we get saved, we stop there and rest in the place of knowing that our names are written in the Lamb’s Book of Life; but when you recognize the full benefit package you receive when you accept Christ (Ephesians chapters 1 and 2), you pursue the next level of your walk with Christ, which is to develop a relationship with the Holy Spirit. This makes hard things easier. God knew we could do nothing without the Holy Spirit, which is why Jesus promised the disciples this Gift before leaving them (John 14:15-18). When life gets to “lifing”, as we say, then ask God to show you the heavenly perspective behind your situation. Once He highlights the reason for the trial or the spirit behind it, apply pressure back on life. After all, we don’t walk in authority (Luke 10:19) for us to get trampled on. We do the trampling.
2) Put the pain in God’s hands so He can work His plan. Ephesians 1:11 (Amplified version) says, “In Him also we have received an inheritance [a destiny—we were claimed by God as His own], having been predestined (chosen, appointed beforehand) according to the purpose of Him who works everything in agreement with the counsel and design of His will”. This means that once you accept Christ as your Lord and Savior, there are automatic benefits that you receive. God had a plan for your life long before the enemy could concoct a plan. He purposed for you to be used for His glory. Whenever the enemy intercepts that, or even when we get off track, God will work everything that has happened in your life into His original plan. Practically, this looks like you running to God whenever you experience the pains and struggles of life and letting Him use it for Him so that you…
3) Don’t let the pain lead you to sin. Don’t let the devil use your pain. It’s so easy for us to be tempted to take matters into our own hands. I remember when people would hurt me and I would get offended and find myself working a plan in my mind to pay them back. While most of the time, God would correct me in time and I found myself crying out to Him for forgiveness, there were times I ignored the Holy Spirit and sinned against God by operating in my flesh. Whenever we give into the temptations of our flesh, the devil has the upper hand in our lives. The best way to close doors to the enemy is to never open them in the first place. Remember, everything starts with a thought before it becomes an action (Luke 6:45).
Pain produces promise if we direct it in the right place. God is always after spiritual blessings in our lives, so let the pain work what He wants it to, and trust that if someone else caused the pain, He’s vindicating you and working it for your good (Romans 8:28).